I never know your motives.

This irritates and confuses me to incredible lengths.

You say you can help.

But all you ever do is drag me down.

You say you love me.

I don’t see or feel it.

I wish I could hate you.

But I love you. More than you will ever realize.

Why do you do these things to me? Why do you say these things?

I don’t even know who you are.

Where is the you I used to know?

Why are you so far away from me?

You will never know how much you confuse and hurt me.

I used to cry over you.

I used to say your name when I put the blade to my wrists.

I was obsessed over what you had done.

All of that is gone now, and I’m a better person.

But you continue to hurt me.

Vater, wo bist du? Liebst du mich?