Before you chose to love me

Please take these next few things

Into account

I will not always be on time

My mind is always a few

Hours behind and so

If I do find time

To be on time then I

Must really like you

My bodies time zone is EST

But my mind always seems to be

In PAST

Looking back rather than forward

Contemplating how I screwed up

The last relationship

So before you love me

Please take into account that I

Will always waste a little time

Maybe only a couple minutes

Of your precious time

Diving myself into the facts

Of people who have already past

The inventor of ice cream

And the waffle cone

An interesting story to say the least

So please have open ears that you

Are willing to give to me

Because please

Before you love me

Take into account that I

Will not always look pretty

I’m not like other girls

And I don’t say that in the way

That I like anime and video games

No I say that

In the way that I won’t put

On a pound of make up for you

My mama raised me to be me

And so my authentic self

Only wears makeup

When either someone dies

Or is to be married

I won’t constrict myself

Into the horse sh*t rules of society

My pad will stand proud in my pocket

I’m not afraid to talk about

My blood sacrifice because

It happens to often for me to

Stay off of that topic

So before you chose to love me

Please take into consideration

That I am an introvert

Cursed forever to want hugs

But to still push you away

and favor my poetry over

Your cooking

Because I’d rather be alone

Sometimes than let you see me cry

I promise I love you

I just

Need a little time to get by

And sort through the mechanics

Of a game that I don’t know how

To even play

Choosing to love me

Honestly sounds stupid

Considering that my tongue

Can be rather ruthless

When it comes to saying what

She truly means

On the inside I know

You chose me but deep down

Like really deep down

Below the nerdy-ness

And over analyzing tendencies

I’m overwhelmed with anxiety

That you’ll leave me

So I put this caution out there

A huge warning sign over my heart

That I am not some piano

To simply be played for my melody

I am a full blown orchestra

And I need someone to sit

And take the time to listen to me

So before you chose to love me

Please know that you aren’t getting

Some pretty princess

You’re getting a hockey player

That can’t skate properly

Tripping over imaginary problems

Crashing to the ice and the puck

Flying into my goal

A score against myself

I can assure you that I am

Not always this way

Clumsy and unforgiving

A part of my head

Doesn’t fill with unneeded dread

But before you chose to love me

Please consider the puzzle

Of why I always seem to struggle

For my heart wishes to love yours

I just have to get up off the floor

Pick up and start over

Maybe our movie isn’t over