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elementary school nightmare
how are we supposed to “never forget” about 9/11
when we don’t have anything to remember about it?
we are taught
year after year after year
with nothing but hateful words
and traumatizing videos.
there are better ways to have us learn about these things.
we shouldn’t be forced watch those videos,
to listen to the voicemails,
just because “it’s history.”
when i was younger,
every time i saw a girl wearing a hijab
or a man with a turban,
i would unconsciously -
or maybe it was consciously -
move a couple inches over because
i was taught that anyone who does that is automatically dangerous.
is automatically a terrorist.
and that the men - the terrorists - forced their women to wear those head coverings.
and you know what the funny thing is?
now i’m the one covering my head for religion.
and i do it for nobody but myself,
just like those beautiful muslim girls i used to be scared of.
and by the way, the men who wear turbans aren’t even muslim. they’re sikh.
but the facts are thrown out the window because
anyone with a little more melanin than “normal”
is scary.
did you know that i had a nightmare for years and years in elementary school
that one day my mommy would go to work and she
wouldn’t come back, and i cried and i begged god to
give me my mommy back, but in this dream, she never did?
do you think it’s fair to do that to a seven year old?
i heard those people on the plane leaving voicemails to their loved ones,
crying and praying to god that they’d survive,
but they didn’t,
just like me and my mommy in that dream.
that’s when i stopped believing in a fair god, by the way.
because if god was good, if god was fair,
he would’ve saved all those people - including the ones you say he hates
because they kill innocent souls.
what about the souls of the young children that were
shot
dead
in a war
that never should’ve happened in the first place?
for those young kids,
my elementary school nightmare
became reality before they could
wake up and learn the truth.
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I, Auggie (he/they) am a 16-year-old transgender student who has been writing since elementary school. My monologue was selected for the Manhattan Theater Club's Student Monologue Competition in April of 2021. I have many inspirations when it comes to writing - gender and sexuality, religion, and mental health, to name a few - and believe there's nothing like a good book or poem to start a conversation.