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Friday Night
I wear my prom dress while doing chemistry homework
To feel a little less lifeless.
I watch videos of reverse photoshop
In a desperate attempt to reprogram my mind.
I paint cherry red on my lips
Wondering if I'll look in the mirror to discover
A beautiful woman.
I act stronger than I believe myself to be
But as time goes on, it becomes all too clear
If I am not enough without it
I will never be enough with it.
I've spent most of my teen years comparing myself to women I found to be far more beautiful and far more worthy than the girl I saw in the mirror. I used pick apart my appearance, wondering if I'd ever be truly satisfied with it. What these turbulent years have taught me is that I am far more than just beautiful and worthy. I look in the mirror and adore what I see because I love myself for all of the intricate details that make me who I am. I am so thankful that I was given a heart that loves poetry and hands that can put my many thoughts into words, and above all, these embody the kind of beauty I wish to exude.