It has commonly been said that you shouldn't let what people say influence what you do. As we all know, that is almost impossible. We are always listening to our parents, friends, teachers and even people we don’t know. We want to be the person everyone expects us to be, while also trying to please ourselves. It is up to us to make the right choices on what people say we should do, and often we let the want of fitting in and making people like us get in the way of the right thing to do.
When people complement us on something, like our clothes and how nice they look on us we begin to really believe it and that builds confidence in us. This is a natural thing for human beings because we strive for approval. But one thing that strikes curiosity within me is that people take that confidence too far. If someone says “oh, you look nice today,” you may think well if that particular person thinks I look nice, and then everyone else must think so, too. I must be better than other people because they didn't look nice today or they weren't complemented.
Confidence is a good thing; in fact, I believe it is necessary to get through life. If you don’t have the ability to stand up and say anything, you will get absolutely nowhere in life. If you can’t speak up, you will not get anything you want, need, or the help you seek. If you do not believe in yourself, who will?
There are many times in my life where I have regretted not saying or doing something because I felt incompetent. But other times I have stepped over the line and taken it so far where I sounded cocky and mean. One question I have is; is there a place amidst being timid, shy, and not saying anything and thinking too much of yourself? And where exactly is the line drawn between confidence and arrogance?
Arrogance blinds you. You forget everyone else around you and what they think and how they feel. You may think that the more confident and proud you act the more people will like you, but in fact it does quite the opposite. Acting proud and confident comes off as arrogant which in turn makes people less likely to talk to you and be your friend. You push people away the more self centered you act and the more you care just about yourself, ignoring the things other people have done to help you get where you are today. If you cant recognize what other people do and appreciate what they do too, you are wasting your time trying to be friends with anybody it is just plain stupid. Your goal in the first place was to be confident have people like you, anyway.
Arrogance doesn't just happen overnight. It is a process that has many important factors incorporated into it. Arrogance is not only about how you feel about yourself, but how other people feel about themselves, too. Everyone has influence on you. Your parents have the biggest influence on you, and when your parents are arrogant you will be to because that is what you grew up with knowing what was right and you don’t know another way to be. You don’t realize that being proud of yourself all the time and expressing to other people constantly is a problem and you don’t realize when people are telling you to stop. Of course, your parents aren't the only ones influencing you, like television and celebrities acting stupid. But celebrities are painted with an image of perfection and some people see them and think there is nothing wrong with them, that they aren't normal people. So you see your favorite celebrity and think “wow they are so perfect,” but really they are acting how they want because they think since they are famous they can do whatever they want whenever they want.
People do not realize how they are acting, even when people tell them. When they do, they go into denial and defend themselves instead of owning up to what they did and righting the wrong, which in the long run would be beneficial for them. They choose not to accept themselves as they truly are, and even when they do it is to late to fix anything and they have ruined whatever was to become of them.
Confidence is good in moderation. Too much and you come off as arrogant and are disliked, too little and you are left with nothing except for the minimal you can do for yourself. Self awareness gives a deeper look into yourself allowing you to realize how what you do affects you yourself and other people around you.