Mixed Feelings


I cannot believe you let them do this to you. I mean, you’re twice their size. You can take them.

I’m not that kind of person.

Oh please, I’m you and I’m that kind of person.

You’re not even a person.

By saying that, you’re saying that you’re not a person.
Well me talking to you disproves that statement.
Can we stop with this nonsense and start planning our revenge?


What revenge? There is no need for such a thing.


Come on what's the point of having me if you don't listen to me.




You know what. I'm beginning to ask myself that question as well.


Oh so now what? Are you just going to get rid of me?


Not completely, but for now, yes. I would like you to leave.


You know what man screw you. I don't need this. Learn to figure these things out on your own.
*****

I can't believe she left us. Its just so unfair. What did you do wrong?

Hey it’s not that bad. I mean, we're still friends.

Friends. Friends! Don't talk to me about being friends. She broke your heart.

Well, not really. The breakup was pretty neutral.

Neutral, ha, I know you’ve shed your share of tears.

Well, yeah, it was a tough situation for me to handle.

And that’s why you need me.

But you've only made the situation worse.

What's that supposed to mean?

It means you haven't been much help.

You know what, fine if that’s how you feel, then bye.

Bye.
*****
Can you leave me now please.
Now why would I do a silly thing like that?
Because you’re starting to get on my nerves.
Oh please don’t be such a grump.
Then don’t give me reason to.
But it’s so much fun!
Yeah for you maybe.
Yeah for you maybe.
Really you’re going to start copying me now?
Really you’re going to start copying me now?
Please stop.
Oh come on, I’m only trying to have a little fun! This place is so boring.
Get over it.
How?
I don't know, take a nap or something.
Hey that’s easy for you to say. You get to walk around and do things. While I’m stuck here in your big fat head.
Well there’s nothing I can do about it, so will you please leave now?
Ugh! Fine, but if you don’t do something interesting soon you can mark my words, I’ll be back.
Fine, bye.
Adios amigo.

*****


O my gosh! That was so much fun. We should totally do that again sometime.

I don’t know. I guess it was alright.

What do you mean alright? The sun is shining, the birds are singing. Everything is perfect.

I don’t know I think you may be over exaggerating.

How can you say such a thing? It’s insulting.

Hey that’s unfair I didn't say it was bad. Just not perfect.

Well I’m just happy to have spent this day with you.

Um...thanks, but still you should really start to learn how to control your emotions.

Look who’s talking!
*****

I don’t want to be here anymore.

Yeah this place sucks.

There’s just no point without anyone to join us.
Yeah screw ‘em we don’t need them anyway.
But I miss them.
Well they’re not here right now so obviously they don’t miss you.
I don’t believe you.
Trust me, when have I ever lied to you?
I don’t know, when did we last talk?
I don’t know. Does it matter?
Yes.
Well, gosh, man. sometime before Mister Angry started to get onto you.
I miss him.

Why?

I wish he was here right now.

Why?

Because he would know how to deal with you.

I thought you wanted them gone.

I did too. But now I just feel lonely without them.

But they just held you back.

No! They kept me in check. They made me angry when I was too passive. They made me do things when i was starting to get lazy. They made me feel pain when I needed to feel pain. Now all I want is for them to come back.

Lies! They were a nuisance.

No! You’re a nuisance! Leave me. I don’t want you here anymore.

Fine!

Good.

I TOLD YOU I’D BE BACK